Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
He told us that was the only place he could get service when we found him in the closet passed out with a beer
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
You have plans tonight?
Stress crying into a bottle of long island ice tea mix...other than that nope
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
I woke up in a strange bathroom. Was I blonde when you left me last night?
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
My roommate just threatened to kill me with my own pan. Can I ever get away from the crazies?!
I really hope this is just a phase, because I am not capable of carrying both of our drunken whore asses through life. Too much dead weight....
You know those times when you're sitting down for a while and r like damn I'm sober but then stand up and r like WOAH HOLD UP.
Grumpy Cat is dead and fuck EVERYTHING.
Tell me you're alive little brother. And please tell me you didn't get arrested. You made no fucking sense last night in your random texts and pictures you were sending me.
Randomize
