i just made an omelette with the cheese and ham from a lunchables. and ketchup packets
julia child would be proud.
Im sitting alone watching titanic. Drunk. Without pants. Holding a fishing pole. Im pretty sure im okay with all of this.
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
Hey man. We haven't met but my name is Ben. I threw up a bunch at your house last night. I heard you smoke though so I'll smoke you out anytime.
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
Woke up this morning with a darth vader helmet and a bath robe on with my toenails shitly painted
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
But on the bright side the arresting officer was just as hot as I remember and I took a pretty okay mugshot.
This is like the fourth time this month I've woken up hungover in someone's backyard
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
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