google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
You told him you were auditioning guys for your new show: "So You Think You Can Fuck."
Best pick-up line ever!
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
Please tell me I didn't help an old woman shave her vagina last night. Please.
That's the least of the fucked up shit you did last night dude.
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
I just want somewhere where I can sit down, without changing my clothes, that will serve me breakfast food and booze. Is that too much to ask?
I don't think I'll get invited back. I drunkenly told her that her kids would be perfect for a pro-abortion campaign.
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
I'm sober now, I ate a whole cantaloupe.
andy told me i got kicked out of the bar and was so drunk i forgot and got back in line. the bouncer was zero impressed
Randomize
