Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
I feel uncomfortable when she gargles my jizz.
She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
I just gift wrapped bread.
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
On my way home from Vegas. Just realized my pants are inside out
Did you write your name in the dust on our toilet tank?
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
Fuck I keep finding new battle scars from our fight. Justin told me I stabbed you with a broom handle.. Do you remember ripping my pants off?
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
I hope you dream of an avalanche of penises
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
Psssh like you wouldn't lick BBQ sauce off my nipples.
And I mentioned the burning debate about your circumcision in my Christmas card to your mom.
Randomize
