so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
Yeah well I just ate cereal out of a muffin pan with a fork. I'll flip a coin as to who has to tackle that pile of dishes we've neglected for 3 weeks.
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
wanna go with us to feed the ducks bread soaked in vodka?
how could i say no?
Have thirty minutes until my shift starts. My heart says liquor store but my future says no
he found you with your pants down, trying to straddle the urinal. no one should have to see their sister like that. ever.
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
You have to summon your inner elephant
I made out with a mom and her daughter and got a black eye, so yeah, my birthday went well
My chance to home wreck was right in front of me and I didn’t grab it by the balls
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
Randomize
