I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
Apparently Bin Ladens last act of terrorism is cock blocking me....
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
The sound of my own breathing is making my head throb. That hungover.
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
I’m never getting home or fucked or eating hot Taco Bell fml
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