his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
Why am I always the sober one?
Cause you're the only one with any sort of self control. It's kinda your super power...
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
I just had a horrible epiphany. I have fucked girls younger than Star Tours
This text was so worth waking up to
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
On NPR this morning, farmers are feeding weed to pigs. The result: pot bacon. Life just got better.
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
Um, just removed my insulin from the fridge so that I could fit our case in there. Tell me, who has their priorities straight? THIS GIRL.
Randomize
