Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
No one understands that once a girl pours a handle of smirnoff all over herself, clearly she is wasted
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
New rule: gentleman callers are required to bring me gifts of beer when coming over to court you. Tell the monster jam dudes so they know.
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
I just put Gatorade in my wine, cause electrolytes, you know.
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
Smoked a blunt with my dad then introduced him to cinnabon delights. Today was a good day.
Just woke up from an extremely erotic dream featuring Steve Buscemi. Now I can't sleep.
I vomited out my contact lenses last night
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
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