Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
Hey so summary of last night. I threw up in a rain boot then tipped it over on my bed, did my laundry and passed the fuck out. I feel like I didn't see you.
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
If I had a dollar for every time i woke up screaming for my pants i"d have enough money to buy all the beer I stole last night.
He was the only guy who ever made me cry..
Who, the park ranger who made you dump out your beer on the beach?
"Little drunk?" Honey you were "livetweeting" Sublime's "Sublime" album while it was playing in his car, and at one point you said you hoped they play Santeria. "Little drunk" doesn't cover it.
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
Just tried to do a line with a snorkel I cut off... that is how my Aruba trip is going!
One a scale of one to hella drunk, how gracefully can I make it down those stairs
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