I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
Well I tried to steal a golf cart. I fought with the Chick-Fil-A cow. And other things.
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
Ok. I am hammered I will admit it but my legacy needs to live and your the only woman that could spawn satan. We need to talk.
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
Rage-masturbating and then crying myself to sleep. Welcome to Wednesday.
So it was all good until she started grabbing my beard and telling me to "roar little lion"
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
Randomize
