if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
i wish you were under my bed. you sexy russian fur trapper.
please. text the right number. youve been sending me these all night.
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
Got robbed by an ATM. My weekend officially sucks.
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
these past three weeks have been a real "fuck you" to my liver
As I was blowing him, he proceeded to tell me that his friend who I blew years ago gave me a five star review on my BJ skills. And, he agrees.
Atta girl.
It's 2 am on the long weekend and what am I doing? Sitting alone in my room eating chips and queso and watching Rio. Fuck I need to get laid.
Fuck you bitch. You're married. You got a live-in dick at home for your needs. I still gotta surf this shitty town's bars for cock
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