what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
just so you know, your brother isn't driving home wasted tonight. he is, instead, in my dorm shower screaming about rubbing his butt with my loofah; thought you would be proud
.....then i was kicked out of my work christmas party......
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
He fell asleep in the strip club and they paid some stripper $20 to sit on his face until he woke up.
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
Ok more importantly someone in a chicken costume just stepped in front of my car and started breakdancing...
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
We probably are going to die. So. Thanks for agreeing to be my Maid of Honor even though I torture you.
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
Randomize
