Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
I only saw you for about 5 min, but you were rambling about how not even the whiskey could make you fight the skeleton guards.
he doesn't even text me anymore.. he just facebook chats me a shark emoticon which has turned into code for 'be naked at my house in 15 mins'
Because of my cut offs, my brother is convinced I fucked a girl so hard she forgot to take her pants. Fairly accurate.
A check for $9 that I used to buy six boxes of Girl Scout cookies bounced. I think I've hit a new low.
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
Question: When you have the names of 4 guys tattoo'd on you, how do you make the 5th one real special?
I'm touching everything in your apartment with my penis.
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
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