Little spoons don't ask big questions
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
you wrote "5 million dollars" in the tip line for the pizza delivery man and insisted that he deserves it
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
Dude's from Puerto Rico. Majoring in Spanish is like us majoring in drinking with a minor in watching Forgetting Sarah Marshall.
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
I just got a get of my turf look from a hooker. Apparently, Ninja Turtles T-shirt+Jeans+Flip-Flops=Hooker Gear. Woot.
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
Just cuz I'm recovering alcoholic does NOT make me the taxi for you every weekend
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
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