small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
He's prob getting laid right now and I'm sitting alone in my duct tape shoes.
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
Have I told you recently that I love you, if for no other reason than you make my irresponsible substance abuse look tame by comparison?
YOU NEED TO STOP BLOWING DUDES ON MY COUCH AT MY PARTIES
YOU NEED TO STOP PROVIDING TEQUILA AT YOUR PARTIES
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
Some girl just walked passed me, said "fuck yeah!" and is now crawling up the stairs
I kept having to give myself encouraging advice like, "you know how a path works"
Like, I want sex but I also would be okay with Netflix
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
Randomize
