Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
I finally got laid.. you said it wouldn't happen.
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
Maybe it's just my body's way of telling me I don't need pinky toes. Like I'm the next evolutionary leap or something...
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
We are literally scheduling phone sex... if that's not long distance af then i don't know what is
I still have that dildo-suction bruise on my forehead and this sweater STILL smells like my Christmas Eve vomit.
if I was a good friend this would be the time that i would remind you that you have a boyfriend
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
Randomize
