We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
You left a skid on my bar stool!!!!
Oops! Sorry about getting stool on your stool!
i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
you woke up and yelled "the tv is moving" and fell on the floor and passed back out
Don't park in the garage. I installed a stripper pole while drunk and it's kinda in the way
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
I just woke up to three dick pics. Apparently in my blacked out state. I was asking for them as the new valentines day card.
Is it acceptable I'm laying in bed drinking airplane bottles?
In our world? Yes, but I'm disappointed yoiu are wasting airplane bottles. Save them for sneaky occasions
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
I am walking funny today. And it's sad because it's from the bad encounter with the sidewalk rather than a good encounter with a stripper
I'm not gonna lie. The only reason I haven't drank a whole bottle of crown tonight is because we only had 3/4 of a bottle left.
Someone's shaving their pubes at work every Monday and it's starting to piss me off
I mean come on
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
Randomize
