she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
You know it was a good weekend when; you leave a bi-lingual letter of apology on top of a stack of cash for hotel housekeeping.
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
Called my ex last night, told her I wanted to bang like we use too, her fiance was in the car, I was on speaker phone. NO MORE TEQUILA!
Did she say Ok?
WHAT THE FUCK JASON, WHY IS THERE A FREE BLOW JOBS BY LISA SIGN IN MY FRONT LAWN WITH MY PHONE NUMBER ON IT?! PEOPLE ARE PULLING INTO MY DRIVEWAY!
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
I have an interview tomorrow and listed you as a reference. If they call you, please don't tell them about the time I smuggled a Chalupa out of Taco Bell in my underwear.
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
Randomize