Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
i'd like someone to explain to me why my clothes are all sticky. including my fanny pack. yes, this is a mass text.
If you die in college, do you die in real life?
Just pulled my keys, cell-phone and a pack of cigarettes out from between my cleavage. This one guy's face was priceless.
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
Dude I broke her toilet blowing some dude. I wasn't going to turn down the 300$ he offered to fix it.
Im gonna get home and destroy this bag of chicken nuggets with my soul.
the evidence suggests last night I either took a bath in beer or drank 18 beers while in the bath. either one sounds good to me. sad i don't remember it
I am naked and annoyed.
You've hit rock bottom, swam around the ocean floor, and brought back silverware from the titanic.
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
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