I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
So apparently I ran down the hall to another party and started handing out uncooked spaghetti to strangers. You'd be surprised how many drunk people will eat raw noodles.
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
I apologize in advance for attempting to drunkenly hookup with your sister
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
its official. the only way for my hair to look good is to blow somebody
She texted her brother about how much she loved his hot tub. He responded three days later that he wasn't aware he owned a hot tub.
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
And at the semi-adult age of 25 I have shit my pants. Not even drunk, just really late to work. Is this real life?
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
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