I thought he was gonna sex me but then he ran to my bathroom and jerked off
just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
getting caught by my parents in bed with another guy was way easier coming out than telling them over dinner like I had planned.
Theres someone in the car behind me eating corn on the cob & talking on the phone
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
Ordered weed last night from the delivery service, and who showed up...my old real estate broker. He said, "this is less stressful." Duh.
My mom called me and we started arguing as usual. I finally screamed at her "I HEAR YOU AND THAT 30 YEAR OLD FUCKING!" and hung up. She hasn't called back yet. I win.
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
Well pretty sure I lost 3 of my best friends in one week. Remember when I said I wasn't sure if I was gonna be a better person or a more despicable one in 2012. Despicable wins.
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
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