Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
i wish every aspect of life was like a bar. flirt with the cute guy two feet across from you and get whatever you want for free
He told me he wanted to break up so he could get "closer to God."
Does God suck his dick?
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
Why am I the only one concerned that there's a dog in the movie theatre?
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
I just realized, you're dating a guy named Jameson. That is another level of whiskey dick.
Uber southern baptist grandma and uber flaming cousin just got into an argument about whether jesus is OK with gay marriage. Aren't these things only supposed to happen at Thanksgiving?
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
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