My dad just told me he used to masturbate to cat woman...he then proceeded to beat my brother in beer pong and wont let me play...
8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
after he passed out we removed everything electronic from his room, stuck in some old books and an ancient typewriter from goodwill. for 20 min. we had him convinced he'd drunk himself backward in time.
i dont even know how to be here
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
Just found a 7-11 receipt for new years eve at 1:30 am apparently we felt the need to buy three jars of pickles and a gallon of milk does this ring any bells?
Sorry I pulled the thermostat off the wall..
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
I found your birth control, it was in your Crown Royal bag.
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
Randomize
