sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
when i got there he was on top of an air mattress in the middle of the pool with a bag of doritos and a 40 telling people he needed his space.
I just made bacon chili cheese fries for dinner...someday my kids are going to realize I'm a stoner & this will all make sense
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
I can't keep up with all the guys you're banging. I'm just going to start referring to them by city of origin.
Please stop using me as a reference for bail bondsmen.
This is one of those times I wish I had a time machine so I could go back and punch myself in the face to make me realize what I need to do before it's too late
OMFG "ASS" JUST STARTED PLAYING ON MY PHONE VIA PANDORA AS IM IN THE CAR WITH A CONGRESSMAN FUCKKKK
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
After returning from the hospital with lock-jaw from getting tackle at the game. Some naked chick busted out of his room and hit him with a devastating haymaker to the jaw because he wouldn't have sex
Randomize
