Almost ran you over in the parking lot. You look good
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
You brought us all personal gifts you had stolen from the party and bellowed "hoes hoes hoes, clepto Santa loves you"
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
I can't tell if I'm still on the hangover from last night, or if I'm experiencing the one from tomorrow, because it was so powerful that it actually traveled back through time...
If you get that boat I will recruit some boat hoes for you and tape a video and sync it to I'm On A Boat. This is happening.
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
she wants homewrecking advice
are you gonna teach her your ways?
obvs. i'm like her yoda.
Randomize