You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
I love you and miss you, which in no way dimishes how much I hate the person you turned out to be, but I still love and miss you.
i never thought i'd have to say "please stop having sex on me"
wow.
yeah, it was that bad.
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
My addiction to golf is getting out of hand....I just caught myself swinging my dick like a putter while peeing.
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
It's a sad night when one of your friend texts you that she's going on a date with someone you know and then invites you to maybe have a drink after
but like who hasn’t gotten fingered at the state fair?
Randomize
