ignore voicemail. the cock hath been unblocked.
Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
You brought us all personal gifts you had stolen from the party and bellowed "hoes hoes hoes, clepto Santa loves you"
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
I refuse to believe you if you're trying to tell me humanity as a whole isn't sad, tired, and craving Chinese food.
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
Hungover on St. Patrick's Day. I did this backwards.
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
She sent me a thank you card for not fucking her boyfriend...
I just licked honey off my own tit. Is there anything about that which doesn't SCREAM single???
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
Randomize