I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
They wouldn't let me go to sleep at the police station while I was waiting to bail u out. YOU OWE ME
The amount I want to die right now is not proportionate to the level of fun I had last night. Not fair.
Small children cheering my name. I am not a decent enough human being to feel comfortable with this.
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
for the record, you never really realize how drunk you still are until you get on rollerskates...
For Halloween this year I'm going to paint myself in gold, wear a golden toga and sash saying " cunt goddess"
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
Our night has progressed to doing coke off a laundry machine through a parking ticket
But he was still all, "YOU TEXTED TONY WHILE YOU WERE GETTING FUCKED?!" Like THAT was the weird part.
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
I was legit late to work one day Bc it took me so long to get a good nude
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