If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
last week i woke up at this guys house...this week i woke up at his ex girlfriends
i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
my three year anniversary of no dick sucking is coming up. you can throw me a party with a penis cake.
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
What's worse: not calling my parents in Dallas to make sure they're alright or not taking shelter to masturbate all over my douchebag roommates clothes?
I worry about you.
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
My sweat smells like Wild Turkey. I'm really feeling the holiday spirit.
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
I just had a guy ask me if his "jewelry downstairs" would set off the metal detector.
Randomize
