coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
Can't wait to go see my drug dealers baby being born. He rolled all of the "it's a boy" cigars into blunts.
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
Hurry up and get here. I already announced to the bar that you were on a mission to get laid tonight. I have 3 takers.
Im so excited to get permanently banned for life from all the old bars again, it is gonna be christmas after all
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
I whipped my shit out and she just stared at it with a mean face. It was like a face off in a heavyweight boxing fight.
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
Randomize
