smell like capt'n and strawberry champagne
Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
she called my cock the "semen sword" and then we invented a position called excalibur
Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
By the end of the first quarter he was so hammered he was pouring beer into the crockpot with the miniature hot dogs and BBQ sauce saying he loved the supper bowl and he loves taking mini weinies to the face
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
I feel like there's no sexy way to pull 12 condoms out of your bra.
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
Lesson learned. No more vodka and toaster strudel
I responded with revoking his blow job privileges. Needless to say, he's learned his lesson.
Oh. Why can't it be something easy, like a punch card for blowjobs?
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