she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
I love you like a cupcake loves an overweight child, very similar to the mannerisms of a whole cake but personal, and minus the commitment issues, plus just the right amount of icing; not to mention the convenience of mobility, and only a smidgen of the guilt😘
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
I woke up with a bagel in my mouth, still ate it. Free breakfast
What's the policy on calling guys who have kids daddy...
Randomize
