so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
We fish bowled my car and anna told us a story about time travel and part of it had people melted into the side of a boat and i imagined them being melted into my car moaning in pain and then we got scared and thought zombies were outside and couldn't leave for a while.
you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
She just kept tellin me God was coming back and he was leavin her with a bag of stale doritoes and shitty friends.
i am pretty sure she ate my hamster last night. i am thinking this because she left me a note that says she ate my hamster and my hamster is no longer in its hamster cage.
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
Her stepmother interrupted our sex to tell her it was midnight and she wanted to do a sympathy shot for her 50th.
Don't break up.
There was this blissful moment of peace and quiet... then you ran past our window with a lit firecracker in hand going, "SHIT. SHIT. SHIT!"
I just got a free round of shots. Don't you DARE fuckin tell me that A-cup boobs can't get you good things.
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
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