I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
can we get nightvision for the apartment?
she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
Drinking vodka straight out of a beer bottle because I don't want to be judged. Not my best idea and not my worst.
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
I just bought a bottle of lube for my car.
Agree to hang out with him and then take a gigantic shit right on him. Or if youve forgiven him for being a fucker maybe make out with him.
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
Normally roommates threatening each other with knives would be too much crazy for me, but I don't have much going on right now and I feel like this could get interesting. So I think I'm gonna ride this shit out for a while.
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
yeah the highlight of my day was the 911 operator telling me they had frantically been trying to figure out where i was
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
Randomize
