Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
I woke up to three texts telling me to "go fuck myself," a panicked voicemail from my mom, and a girl thanking me... I'm not sure which I should take care of first
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
I woke up to his gay cousin telling me I had the prettiest boobs. I don't even wanna know.
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
You pretended to pelvic thrust my mother on the boat while my 92 year old grandmother looked on. Thanks.
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
Curdled. you forgot that word. It was a curdled buttery nipple shot.
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
I'm so cold without your freakishly high body temperature
that's the equivalent to a normal girlfriends. 'I miss you' btw
So today the police came to my dorm to look for weed, i didn't have any in the room, so i let them in. they apologized for any inconvenience and then left after finding nothing. then i realized i was wearing gauges with weed leaves on them lol
It's all fun and games until your mom recognizes your bootycall from 2018 as her attorney
Randomize
