And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
I mean, once you get beat with a dildo you can't look at someone the same
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
I was in the bathroom puking up mountains of tequila and when he came to help me, I held the door shut and kept yelling at him to let me be a lady.
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
Home-made laxative recipe: activia yogurt and tequila shots. Any ratio ought to work.
I'm trying to get laid this Halloween, not inspire the next season of AHS
i can't even hate his new girlfriend cuz she survived a fucking brain tumor. like that's just not fair.
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
Valentine's Day is now to be known as Tacos and Orgasms Day.
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
God specifically crafted these hands to deal out orgasms.
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
No, it's okay that he's on a date. I attach no more emotion to him than I do my vibrator.
Randomize
