Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
I am pretty sure I told him the clouds were earth's purest filtration system and that snow was the rarest and most delicious water in the world. My lips are burning because we ate so much.
My sister was crawling her way home and kept asking us to carry her,then she insisted on grabbing at our ankles til she passed out, how was your night?
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
Sorry. Not doing life today. Love to. But can't.
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
And then he dove into my vagina like scrooge mcduck into a room of gold
Had to walk of shame past Westminster Abbey this morning. Pretty sure a Japanese tourist took a photo of me.
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
Learning to live poor pretty well. Cashed in all the coins in my car for nearly 60 bucks and yelled at a Pizza Hut manager, insisting I have a free pizza credit, until he just gave me a pizza.
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
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