No, drunk sperm still make babies.
oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
I don't have any food so I made a martini so I could eat the olives. Don't tell me I can't think outside the box.
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
She nearly killed the mood when she said "Don't cum on my spray tan"
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
oh my god, just saw a man throw up in a trashcan and blood came out of his nose. HES GETTING ON MY BUS. HES SITTING ACROSS FROM ME. FUCK.
If we can put a man on the moon, I'm sure we can turn a pringles can into a bong.
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
What the hell was that?
Genius. It was sheer genius.
Randomize
