Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
I Once took so much Ecstacy that I tried to hug a fire.
i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
nothing screams I HAVE A PROBLEM! like the case of miller lite sitting on top of my DUI papers in the passenger seat of my car. lol
she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
I saw a chick at 8 am this morning walking back to my dorm wearing wings... I'm kind of jealous.
I had a dream that I had 21 friend requests. it was the best day
No, he's fine. He only wanted to know why there were traffic pylons in the living room and how the peanut butter got on the ceiling.
If he's dead I'm so gonna get the blame. I have his passport, keys and his tooth in my purse.
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
I don't want a baby! I JUST WANT AN ORGASM THAT ISN'T SELF INFLICTED.
so...the lady doing my pedi totally noticed the human bite marks on my calf. Who says marriage ends your sex life? Love u!
Remember that guy I fucked last month? Well I'm watching his dog this weekend while he's in the Bahamas with his girlfriend. What is my life
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