y did u give ur computer a hand job?
so the chest pain/shortness of breath/overdose guy we just took to tm hospital is now running down market street from the police in a gown holding his iv.
My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
Just as I was applauding myself for the best wing man award, I realized we are going to have to burn our futon.
I woke up in a bush somewhere in Tucson with a full suit on. Great way to end my birthday.
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
We found him. He just came running out of the closet with a bruise on his face saying he has been fighting elves in Narnia for a year.
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
Randomize
