At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
Hey for future reference vodka can not be substituted for water when shaving your legs
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
The Olympian is in my bed
That awkward moment when the guy you were hitting on at the bar last night is a possible suspect in a murder case.
My roommate randomally bought me two bags of pretzels. Worst "Sorry you can hear me fucking my boyfriend everynight" gift ever.
I'm making a sandwich topless right now. Remind me again why I don't have a boyfriend?
What are you doing tomorrow?
Dude its my bday. Im drinking from sunup til face down. Rinse and repeat.
Randomize
