We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
Fun times on public transportation. I just had a guy imply that I was racist cause I didn't want to talk to him when I was clearly reading my book and he was clearly on coke.
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
Uber driver offered to have sex with me since I went home solo. - rock bottom
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
I'm in my math teacher's garage hiding right now because I fucked his son last night. It's fine
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
Help I can't tell if I'm sexually attracted to Bill Nye
Oh.
You came to the right person.
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
Randomize
