everything is bigger in texas. Including my drinking problem.
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
If your dick isn't up when i get home you're catching tonight.
I gave the naked guy in the hotel hall a pop tart. He stopped crying.
he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
Honestly, your dog is in better hands with that homeless guy.
She was sitting there stuffing her face rubbing my back with a dorito cheese filled hand while eating something else with the other hand as I was crying.
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
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