i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
Picking up third year law school girls is like MILF hunting for beginners
My favorite part about you getting arrested is having to explain the prosthetic leg in the front seat.
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
Ok, maybe I don't want to know what happened last night... But somehow I guess I moved the oven.
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
She took the bride and groom figures and the top layer of their cake and tried to walk out of the reception with it in her purse.
booty call birthday vouchers, best idea ever. it's like giving a present to myself for someone else's birthday.
Fyi: beer caps are stronger then bathroom counters
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
Apparently I'm the last girl he had sex with. That was over a month ago. If he can go that long without sex then he's clearly not the guy for me
At first I was nervous about leaving him my undergraduate legacy, but apparently he made out with lesbians, woke up with hickeys and a different shirt. My family name will survive.
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