Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
That moment when you cant decide between eating spaghetti or a Popsicle for breakfast
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
Randomize
