I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
My grandpa just complimented my boobs. Im taking this as a compliment but also brushing it off as alcoholism on his part.
My goal for tonight: make tomorrow as awkward as humanly possible.
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
I just saw my 7th grade teacher at the club. We had a pretty good talk over drinks. Turns out we both like dancing on tables.
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
But we only had three ninja turtles. So everyone that would ask us where Donatello was, we would say "what? He's gone? Shredder is at it again!"
Oh, don't mind me, that's just my vagina rattling.
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
Randomize
