Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
Who was that guy you went home with?
Hang on, I'm trying to ask his name right now.
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
I told him we can only be friends from now on & he said he knows but that I'm the 'best he ever had'.
you slept with him again didn't you
you can't just quote Drake AND compliment me at the same time & receive nothin. he knows me too well
Fyi when u order four mini bottles of scotch on a 45 min flight. The flight attendants jaw drops to the floor.
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
isn't that the guy who always buys you drinks?
yeah. i love a man who still buys me drinks after the bar cuts me off.
next time on intervention
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. �Hello 29...
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
Using Michelob Ultra as champagne.
which one of you assholes put my new jeans down the garbage disposal?!
Is it bad that we left the kid passed out on the bus? I think his name was texas. I was too drunk to be questioning this.
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
Randomize