Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
i need a new camera phone. my pictures from last night are as blurry as my memories. and neither tell me why i woke up in an airplane hangar.
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
My brain and heart say thanks but my vagina isn't super pleased with you right now
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
You just managed to turn Dr. Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
THE COP WHO TOOK MY MUGSHOT LAST NIGHT JUST ADDED ME ON FACEBOOK
I remember reading the word "lift" so I did. The alarn went off, and I thought to myself "what dumbass pulls the fucking fire alarm?" and then I realized it was me...
Randomize
