i passed out on the floor in my hallway and woke up with my dog licking himself 2 inches from my face. my first reaction? envy
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
but then i turned into a human whiteboard because i thought it was a good idea to bring out markers
Reason 37 booty call break ups suck: I literally could not find his house in the daytime.
And then the lady sheeps would bring me the finest grass to eat cuz im the sheep king and id have sexy smooth sheep fur
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
Looking back on this weekend, I'm most grateful I never brought up with word "toe-fucking" at the bachelorette party.
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
I am literally watching TV with sunglasses on because the brightness hurts my hangover
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
Do not ever chug tabasco sauce.
Randomize
