We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
Just saw a woman trying to order Mcdonalds at a trash can. God bless America.
Saved a second guy who was crying/on the verge of wigging out. Just call me the drug whisperer.
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
I gave three different guys a boner at the same time last night, and none of them are in the same city as I am. That's achievement.
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
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